Piers Morgan Makes Children Cry on America's Got Talent

Piers Morgan and Simon Cowell seem to be conspiring to make sure no British man ever gets laid again.

These two wankers have made the male population living under the Union Jack seem like a Confederacy of Jackasses with their constant hectoring of harmless human beings going after a dream. There's no bigger turn off than listening to adult men spew judgment over stupid things. Morgan and Cowell, who play the roles of reality TV blowhards, represent British men so poorly the UK's inbreeding concerns seem destined to continue for a third millenia.

Sure, most of America has no talent and those who step up for public ridicule don't possess much sense either, but there are ways of letting them know it without going off on a huffy blather that's nothing more than a personal head trip.

Morgan, who turns out to be the weird one on a judiciary panel that features Sharon Osbourne and David Hasselhoff, even railed into children during Tuesday night's season debut of America's Got Talent, which is little more than the Gong Show without the cymbalry. When Morgan got on a nine-year-old dancer who was an all-too-real version of Abigail Breslin's Olive character in Little Miss Sunshine, Osbourne threatened to quit (good for her). Morgan repeatedly slammed kids with tactless zeal, making several cry and coercing host Jerry Springer into proclaiming he was going too far.

If Morgan did see Little Miss Sunshine, he sure missed the point. And if he knows anything about judging, it doesn't show. He's what people are talking about, not the good, bad and awful performers during the program's elimination round. Judges shouldn't steal the show - just ask the French woman from the 2002 Winter Olympics.

There are wagers available on who will win. For the latest America's Got Talent odds, visit the Bodog Sportsbook. The favorites who emerged from the Dallas competition of the NBC show include a girl group called Southern Girl who'll make Destiny's Child fans take interest and a nerdy-looking sax player who's good on stage but off it seems like one of those annoying acting types who has to always be on.

PHOTO: This guy's name is Piers Morgan. He's British - and he's an asshole. (Photo courtesy of NBC.com)